Hello again and welcome. My beautiful son invited me to join him in an afternoon walk around the course as he played golf. I know him to be quite hard on himself and I knew he would want to have a good game if I was with him. I just wanted to be with him and couldn’t have cared whether he had a great game or the game from hell…..unfortunately, he had the game from hell. He started out fine and then lost form and as his form deteriorated his frustration grew in direct comparison. At times it was hard not to smile, cos to me it’s just a game and I was out to enjoy the afternoon, despite it involving all of the following ; rain bursts, wind gusts, rainbow, sun and gale force winds. There were a few moments when it took all of his control not to send the offending club, sailing through the air and over the nearest fence, preferably, never to be seen again. I was alerted to this by the intense grip he took on the club as he slashed at the air, muscles rippling, the purplish tinge to his face and the gritting in his jaw muscles (oh and the few expletives)
Seeing his frustration, I attempted to cool it down by making several points, which I felt contained profound wisdom!!!!!:
- How much I was enjoying his company and had no care about it being a good or bad game
- How lucky he was to be able to play golf, being a healthy young man and all that
- How perspective was important, that is, that his life did not depend on the game outcome(luckily), that his life currently had few struggles and that a little white ball having a mind of its own was really fairly unimportant.
Needless to say…….his golf continued to flounder and I was told that none of what I’d said really helped…..no surprise there!!!!!
We walked on and it occurred to me how golf really can become a practice in the art of letting go (& I don’t mean of the club!) One needs to approach each new hit without holding on to what came before. If you are having a bad game (an understatement in this case) and you carry the sense of failure to every new hit, you are destined to fail again because the negativity takes over and works its way through your mind and body so you can’t rectify the error cos you are just so dam tense and so determined to fail again (eg I’m playing hopeless, I can’t play golf who am I kidding, I should just give up). If you can stay in the moment, move into your body and sense what it is doing and feeling, enjoy the atmosphere and relaxation of the game, then you have a chance of turning your performance around and if not, at least enjoying the moment and seeing the beauty around you. If you say “See that sand bunker, for sure the ball will end up there”….guess what….it will!!!!
So I say, breathe deeply, feel the wind or rain or sun on your face, smell the scent of oncoming rain, smile at the rainbow, enjoy the feeling of your body swinging the club, watch the little white ball roll into the bunker (without judgement or a feeling of horror) and smile because you are living life to its fullest.
Bye for now
Leanne(mother of he who let the little white ball get to him)